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Jerry Goodman

“Rosh Hashana # 6”
My mother told me that the years speed up as you get older. While you are young it seems so long until you can achieve your goals, but as you achieve them, as you grow in years, they speed on fast. Time is relative as Micah explained to me. Time is not the same for every person or generation. Think of the lost generations of which little is known — like the Dark Ages and the light of knowledge that still shines from Greece and Jerusalem. For Jerusalem it is about time, eternal time, and 3,000, 2000 19 and 40 year numbers that are always in our vocabulary.

I look at the wonder of our family 6 years later. All of you are thriving the family has grown and is growing. Everyone of you are growing and flowering as you wind you ways through the challenges of establishing yourselves, thank G-d, in our land and the land of our forefathers.

Tani is like Jerusalem to me. He is eternal, he had the Golden Edge. He was from those chosen to lead. He is 17 but he will be 23. He was old when he was young and yet he grows in our collective and individual memories from year to year. Sometimes the memories are not clear. Sometimes others, including ourselves, have built this memory into more than he was, into a legend. Of that I am glad because legends of the good people are important. Remember their deeds no matter what their age, remember their goodness. I can only remember Tani in this way. The giant of men. Tall, Handsome, Fearless, and filled with goodness and mercy with the temper of a Dragon as he breathed his bursts of anger on his siblings and others.

So this year we begin the 7th year. The Sabbatical Year for the land and we will enter the 1st Sabbatical year of Tani’s movement to another and better place. Let us all continue to learn from our youngest son and brother. Learn that all challenges can be faced, that modesty, tolerance, and love for others are rewarded in the afterlife and that we received Tani’s reward from our friends and community. Let us proclaim together that this New Year will bring growth, hope, and love to our family and pray that Tani continues to watch over all of our extended family for this coming year.

Meg Gardiner

Life is like a narrow bridge. The most important thing is not to be afraid.
Rabbi Nachman of Breslov, as quoted by my Jewish uncle.
The key to the crossing is to live without fear. Doing so can take incredible courage; my uncle related the quote to me right after his youngest son, my cousin Tani Goodman, died five years ago. It’s the way the Goodman family lives every day: wholeheartedly, with great love and bravery.
And it’s the way Tani lived. He only got seventeen years on earth, but did he ever. We miss you, cuz.
1 response so far ↓
• Snart // February 8, 2007 at 1:53 am
In today’s world, it is a challenge “not to be afraid.”
Given their loss, I hold the Goodman family in highest esteem for their continued belief in the goodness of mankind, for continuing their lives with courage though they lost part of their hearts, and for their enriching presence in the world they touch.

Amanda James and Mark Gilbert

February , 2007
Tani’s 5th Yahrtzeit
Dear Maggie and Jerry,
Just to let you know we’re thinking of you all, and Tani, today.
Although another year has passed – time is irrelevant – as I’m sure, for
you, its as if it were yesterday when Tani moved on.
What you have to endure – is simply terrible.
Sending you all our love from London,
Amanda & Mark

Kate Shreve

February , 2007
Dear Maggie and Jerry,
…… I just wanted to send you a note to let me know that I’m thinking of
you and hope that you’re all holding up out there. Tani was a
wonderful person and I still miss him. But I’m sure he’s with all of
you as he is with me……

Rabbi Jan and Bonnie Goldstein

Feb. 14, 2006
I cannot believe it is four years. I happened upon the website as I was giving a talk about Tani ( I previously have spoken about him, including soon after his death, and wrote you about it at that time) to an ad hoc group of young people who had gathered in Los Angeles for a shabbaton on Heroes and Role Models. Several hundred teens and they all know who Tani is now. The leaders say your work with the donor transplant also served as the inspiration for their session on the topic during free discussion. All were directed to visit the website in Tani’s memory…

Please know, though years may go when we don’t speak or see one another, that you are often in my thoughts, more than you know. And Tani continues to live through his story, website, your friends and you, his beloved family. Zichron livracha. May his memory ever be for a blessing.

Love, Jan and Bonnie


Beginning thoughts on the book to be written about Tani.

August 2, 2005.
During those days Tani was very fresh in my mind, and I could remember clearly so many conversations we had had during those past 6 months. However, I wasn’t able to finish this at that time.

Only now am I able to continue with this as we are about to finally upload all our writings to the new Tani site on the internet.
I have decided to include this document because after nearly 4 years, I re-read things and realize that what I thought I would never forget, I had shockingly forgotten.
I of course never stop thinking of Tani and missing him. My hope is that everyone will be able to add their memories to this site and keep them renewed. I know the task is difficult, as Jonathan Reiner says so well in his beautiful essay about memory and Tani.